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Happily married people are brimming with uplifting love and relationship advice, especially while still in the honeymoon phase. But, as Self points out, it's the divorced people who can truly speak to the trials and tribulations that marriage can present. The magazine recently reached out to soon-to-be brides regarding the best marriage and relationship advice they'd received from a divorced friend or relative. Having weathered the storm themselves, their resulting tips are as profound as they are eye-opening. In their own words, here's what to keep in mind before walking down the aisle:
"My friend Tammy told me, 'I put way too much pressure on my ex to satisfy all my needs and make me happy. That's why he left. It was a hard lesson to learn that no one else can be responsible for your well-being.'" — Linda
"Here is what my best friend Diane told me she's learned from having her marriage fall apart: 'Don't always rely on your spouse to come up with fun adventures for the two of you to nip boredom in the bud.'" — Naomi
"My brother-in-law, who'd been divorced twice before meeting my sister, gave me advice I will remember forever: 'Don't be threatened when your partner changes. You will change too. It's about accepting each other and welcoming growth, not trying to keep your other half in a box.'" — Sheila
"My friend Sondra told me, 'Remember the expression: 'Walk a mile in the other person's moccasins? Empathy is key. I think the major reason Dan and I got divorced is because we never truly tried to understand for the other person's point of view.'" — Anne
For more, read up on the less obvious, but most common, reasons behind divorce.